When Should You Teach Children the Correct Names for Their Private Parts?

At around the age of 3 children should ditch the baby names for their private parts. It is very important to teach your child the correct name for their body parts as well as to instill in them to keep that area private. A child who knows the correct names of the private area and knows that that area is private will be very alert and will be able to clearly tell the parent if anyone tries to touch them inappropriately.

It is also important to never let your child feel ashamed for being curious about his or her body, in fact if a child expresses curiosity of the private area, a parent should use that situation to teach the child. Teach boys what and where their testicles are and penis is , teach them these words no matter how mature they sound. Teach girls what their vagina is as well as their chest and nipples are, even though they may seem very young. Teach both girl and boy that their private areas (including their bottom) are private which means that only they can touch and look at the area, and to let no one (teachers, neighbors, or friends )look or touch that part of the body. A parent might catch their child touching his/her private area, this behavior is normal and very innocent, if a parent does catch their child doing this the parent must not yell or punish the child. If a parent would rather the child not touch him/herself it should be done so politely but firmly, however, some parents do choose to deem this behavior acceptable and innocent and take no action to it. It is up to parents to instill into their children what they feel is appropriate and inappropriate behavior.

A parent must also express to their children what a good touch and a bad touch is, a good touch is shaking hands, hugging, holding hands, a pat on the back, a bad touch is where a person touches a child in the private area (penis, vagina, chest etc.) A parent must let the child know that sometimes very nice people will try to touch them in a very bad way, and that is called a bad touch and if someone does touch them in that way to tell them to stop and then to tell you right away. If a child does get touched, a parent should let the child know that what the person did was a very bad and wrong thing to do. Express to the child that what happened was not his/her fault, he/she is not in trouble and to never be scared to tell you if anyone touched him/her. Express to the child to tell you what happened even if the bad person said to keep what it a secret or that he will hurt the child or the child’s family. Parents should not wait for an incident to occur to tell their children not to be afraid to tell them what happened. Before anything happens let the child know never to be afraid to tell. Parents should tell the child to let them know if the child feels scared around a certain person.

Let children know some ways nice people may try to get them to show their privates; for example a parent could say to their child; “a nice man might say to you, let me check your penis or vagina to make sure that you are okay, trust me, I am your friend, I will not hurt you.” The parent should then tell the child if that happens to run away to get help, or to tell you right away because, “that was a very bad man, who said a very bad thing.” You may have to get very serious and specific with your child because sexual predators are everywhere, in church, in school, at the library etc. Also let girls know that woman may try to touch them inappropriately and the same with men and boys.

A good way for parent’s to test their child’s understanding of keeping their private parts private is to ask them what they would do in certain situations; “What would you do if a woman asks you to come into the bathroom with her so that you can show her what your vagina looks like?” Or “What if your friend wants to see your penis, what would you do?”

Remember to use the correct terms for the private area, no matter how mature they may sound..