Amusing Outdated Wisconsin Laws

Like every other state, Wisconsin has its fair share of outdated laws, most of which are no longer enforced. These laws make one ponder, just who was given authority at one time in United States history?

Wisconsin State Laws

It is illegal for a man to cut a woman’s hair.

In state prisons, all prisoners must be served real butter, as opposed to margarine or other substitutes.

When two trains come to an intersection, neither train can move until the other trains moves first.

Toilets that are “manually flushed” are prohibited in all public bathrooms.

At one time, margarine and all other butter substitutes were totally illegal to sale, purchase, serve, or use in Wisconsin.

Kissing on a train might cost ya.

Apple pie and any cheese product may not be served within the same meal in any restaurant.

Once upon a time, rape was defined as “a man having sex with a woman that he knows is not his wife”. That’ll teach him to cheat!

Sun Prairie Laws

All snow on your property must be removed immediately, as it is considered “a nuisance.

“Hey, Ma! Look, no hands!” Better not try riding a bike with no hands in Sun Prairie, as it is totally illegal.

Cats are strictly prohibited from dwelling in or entering any cemetery within city limits.

Milwaukee Laws

While various fire arms are fine to purchase and own, weak fireworks such as sparklers are 100% illegal.

Playing the drums or the flute in the street is strictly prohibited – if you are doing so for the purpose of “obtaining attention”. Uhh, okay.

Any disfigured, obese, or unattractive individual is technically not allowed to be in public during daylight hours.

It is considered a crime to park your car on the street for more than two hours unless you have a horse tied to it. Simple solution, right?

Wauwatosa Laws

Please don’t lie to reserve a meeting room within city limits. It’s not cool and is punishable by a fine or even jail time.

If the Wauwatosa Library “demands” you return your books, you should probably do so or you could lose your library card and even be forced by the city to pay a large fine.

Better not spit in public or it could land you in the slammer.

La Crosse Laws

Topless mannequins may not be displayed in any store window or the owner could serve jail time. Can’t have any fun in La Crosse!

Playing checkers in public is against the law.

No person may “bother, pester, or annoy” squirrels.

Hudson Laws

Sitting on someone else’s car is punishable by jail time.

Screens are required on all windows, even on personal property, or a fine is issued.

Don’t throw your garbage in someone else’s can, you lazy bum.

Racine Laws

No woman may walk the streets after dark without the company of a male escort.

Shooting missles or fireworks of any sort at a parade will land you in jail. Aww, come on!

Even in the event of a fire, waking a sleeping fireman is a punishable offense.

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